Living with grief: there is no timetable

Grief after a death, separation or major loss can bring sadness, anger, guilt, relief, numbness or all of them. It can be loud, and it can be very quiet. There is no correct order and no deadline.

Rituals, memory, faith, writing, and the company of people who knew the loss can help some people. Others need practical structure first. Let people help with specific things, and allow yourself to say no.

• Keep meals and sleep as regular as you can
• Name what you need: company, quiet, practical help
• Let memories come without judging them

Consider professional support if grief keeps you from basic care, lasts a long time without any ease, brings thoughts of self-harm, or feels tangled with trauma. A therapist can make room for the loss without asking you to leave it behind.